stress can be the same as those for suicide, which is why it’s so
important to ask.
“Don’t be surprised if someone says they’re not suicidal but
does want to talk about what’s stressing them out,” said Thompson.
This is also important because supporting them and alleviating
stress can help prevent suicide thoughts before they start.
The third possibility is that they say “yes,” they are thinking
about suicide.
“If they do say yes, it’s important to take them seriously,” said
Thompson. “Don’t assume that they’ll get better or work through it
alone. At that point, it’s up to you to help them.”
The good news is you’ve already been brave enough to start this
conversation and come this far, so you can get through the rest
as well.
“Emphasize that you care about them and you want them to
stay safe and alive,” said Thompson. “Tell them that you want to
connect them to a resource for more help, and that you can do
that together.”
Examples of resources can include your HR department,
Employee Assistance Program (EAP), a crisis line, a mental health
clinic, a hospital or a faith leader. LivingWorks ASIST is a program
designed to provide someone with these skills. Remember that
not all resources are available in all places, and not all of them will
work well for all people.
“Knowing your local resources is half the battle,” said Thompson.
“That’s some homework you can do beforehand, and it will help
you greatly in that moment. For example, if you have high confidence
in your HR department’s ability to help, and you’ve talked
to them, you can not only use them in that moment, you can also
recommend that as an avenue for other employees to use.”
Once you’ve identified a resource, do everything you can to see
the connection through.
“If possible, wait with them while you dial the number, or walk
or drive with them to help,” said Thompson. “You don’t want to
intrude on their privacy, but you also want to make sure that they
get connected to that help.”
Thompson also has some guidance on what not to do.
“Avoid phrases like ‘It’ll get better’ or ‘Everyone goes through
tough times’ – when someone is thinking about suicide, those
statements feel empty,” he said. “Similarly, don’t try to solve their
problems or carry out a full-scale intervention yourself. There are
training programs out there that can help you do that even if you’re
not a mental health professional, but unless you’ve gone through
that training, you’re better off connecting them to trained help.”
Ultimately, Thompson says, it’s up to each of us to watch out for
one another, just like you would for a co-worker at a worksite filled
with hazards such as slips, trips and falls.
“As someone’s co-worker or supervisor, we spend a lot of time
with them – maybe even more than their family. That means we’re
one of their best defenses if they’re struggling. We have a relationship
with them, and we can use that connection to engage them
and help them stay safe. There’s real power in that.” t
LivingWorks offers a range of easy and effective online and faceto
face trainings to help with these conversations. Learn more at
www.livingworks.net.
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